Five Years Gone Read online

  “Fuck off,” I tell him, all but admitting to what I’m doing. The moment is lost and so is Ava. The memories have retreated into a past so sweet, I wonder what point there could possibly be in trying to go on without her. It’s occurred to me—on more than one occasion since she made her choice—that I could take too many of the pain meds I was given when I left the hospital and make it all go away. Who would care? Ava is gone, and my two closest friends in the world were killed in the Al Khad raid. It would be so easy to take the pills, to slip away, to finally find some peace.

  I haven’t done it for one very important reason—Ava. I’d never do that to her. I wouldn’t ruin the rest of her life by taking mine and leaving her to think it was her fault. So even though losing her nearly killed me, I force myself to continue on so my death won’t destroy her happy new life.

  Fucked up, right? Believe me, I know.

  I get out of the shower and fumble through the process of drying off and getting dressed, which I’ve had to relearn along with just about everything else since I lost my leg. Even with the prosthetic, my balance is precarious, and I still have a great deal of pain—real and phantom—in my missing leg.

  By the time I’m dressed in jeans and a button-down that’s come from a dry cleaner thanks to Muncie, I’m completely depleted and sweating. So much for the shower.

  I hear Muncie talking to someone in the next room, which means she’s here. Though it’s the last fucking thing I feel like doing, I drag myself up on the crutches and make my way to the door to meet this woman Ava swears is the best at dealing with the media and the staggering amount of bullshit that has become my life lately.

  I pull open the door, and the first thing I see is a red dress and three-inch black fuck-me heels at the end of a stunning pair of legs. I may be heartbroken, but that doesn’t mean I don’t notice great legs when I see them. I let my gaze travel up the front of her until I connect with big, startled doe eyes.

  I can’t believe Ava sent me Mary Fucking Poppins.

  * * *

  Look for One Year Home, releasing in 2019.

  Thank you for reading Five Years Gone! The idea for Ava’s story came to me at the beginning of 2017. I thought about it so much that I had to stop my regular programming at the end of 2017 to WRITE the book that was demanding my attention. Sometimes that’s how the muse works! I can tell her—but the readers want more Gansett or Fatal—and she says, "Too bad, this is what we’re writing now. Get over it.” She’s the boss, and I do what she tells me to. Since she rarely leads me astray, I wrote FYG in November and December of 2017. Then I got the big idea to translate it into French and German so my readers in those countries could have it the same time as everyone else, pushing the release date to October of 2018. I want to thank my amazing publishing partners at Kensington Books for handling the distribution of the trade paperback editions as well as Andi Arndt and Joe Arden for narrating the amazing audio edition, which is well worth a listen whether you’re an audiobook fan or not. They are two of the most popular voices working in romance today, and I’m thrilled to have them attached to this project. To have a book out in print, ebook, audio, French and German ON THE SAME DAY is the holy grail of indie publishing, and I couldn’t be more excited to get Five Years Gone out to my readers and listeners around the world. I hope you love Ava’s story as much as I enjoyed writing it, and watch for the sequel, One Year Home, featuring John, out next summer.

  So many people help me to do what I do, including my husband, Dan Force, and my amazing team behind the scenes, Julie Cupp, Lisa Cafferty, Holly Sullivan, Isabel Sullivan, Nikki Colquhoun, Anne Woodall, Kara Conrad, Linda Ingmanson, Joyce Lamb, Jessica Estep and Jules Bernard. I always say that I couldn’t do what I do without them, but it’s 1000 percent true, especially with this book in which we knocked the collective cover off the ball to make it available in three languages, print, ebook and audio on the same day. GO TEAM JACK!

  The biggest thanks of all go to my readers, who make my dreams come true every day with their love for me and my books. Having reader friends all over the world is a gift I never take for granted. I’ve never felt the love of my readers more profoundly than I did this past summer after I lost my beloved dad. Thank you for always supporting me—and my muse—on this incredible journey.

  Much love,

  Marie

  * * *

  Join Marie’s newsletter mailing list to never miss a new book, a giveaway or other exciting news!

  * * *

  Be the first to know when Marie’s next book is available! Follow her on BookBub to receive new release and discount alerts.

  * * *

  Follow Marie at Book+Main to read saucy bits from her books as well as her works in progress!

  * * *

  Other Books By Marie Force

  Download A FREE Sample of Books by Marie Force

  * * *

  Love Always Boxed Set, First Books in Four of Marie’s Bestselling Series

  * * *

  Contemporary Romances Available from Marie Force

  * * *

  The Gansett Island Series

  Gansett Island Boxed Set, Books 1-3

  Gansett Island Boxed Set, Books 4-6

  Gansett Island Boxed Set, Books 7-9

  Gansett Island Boxed Set, Books 10-12

  Gansett Island Boxed Set, Books 1-10.5

  Gansett Island Boxed Set, Books 1-16

  Book 1: Maid for Love

  (Maddie & Mac)

  Book 2: Fool for Love

  (Joe & Janey)

  Book 3: Ready for Love

  (Luke & Sydney)

  Book 4: Falling for Love

  (Grant & Stephanie)

  Book 5: Hoping for Love

  (Evan & Grace)

  Book 6: Season for Love

  (Owen & Laura)

  Book 7: Longing for Love

  (Blaine & Tiffany)

  Book 8: Waiting for Love

  (Adam & Abby)

  Book 9: Time for Love

  (David & Daisy)

  Book 10: Meant for Love

  (Jenny & Alex)

  Book 10.5: Chance for Love, A Gansett Island Novella (Jared & Lizzie)

  Book 11: Gansett After Dark

  (Owen & Laura)

  Book 12: Kisses After Dark

  (Shane & Katie)

  Book 13: Love After Dark

  (Paul & Hope)

  Book 14: Celebration After Dark

  (Big Mac & Linda)

  Book 15: Desire After Dark

  (Slim & Erin)

  Book 16: Light After Dark

  (Mallory & Quinn)

  Book 17: Victoria & Shannon (Episode 1)

  Book 18: Kevin & Chelsea (Episode 2)

  A Gansett Island Christmas Novella

  Book 19: Mine After Dark

  (Riley & Nikki)

  Book 20: Yours After Dark

  (Finn McCarthy)

  * * *

  The Green Mountain Series

  Book 1: All You Need Is Love

  (Will & Cameron)

  Book 2: I Want to Hold Your Hand

  (Nolan & Hannah)

  Book 3: I Saw Her Standing There

  (Colton & Lucy)

  Book 4: And I Love Her

  (Hunter & Megan)

  Novella: You'll Be Mine

  (Will & Cam’s Wedding)

  Book 5: It's Only Love

  (Gavin & Ella)

  Book 6: Ain’t She Sweet

  (Tyler & Charlotte)

  * * *

  The Butler, Vermont Series

  (Continuation of Green Mountain)

  Book 1: Every Little Thing

  (Grayson & Emma)

  Book 2: Can’t Buy Me Love

  (Mary & Patrick)

  Book 3: Here Comes the Sun

  (Wade & Mia)

  * * *

  The Treading Water Series

  Book 1: Treading Water

  (Jack & Andi)

  Book 2: Marking Time

  (Cla
re & Aidan)

  Book 3: Starting Over

  (Brandon & Daphne)

  Book 4: Coming Home

  (Reid & Kate)

  * * *

  Single Titles

  Five Years Gone

  Sex Machine

  Sex God

  Georgia on My Mind

  True North

  The Fall

  Love at First Flight

  Everyone Loves a Hero

  Line of Scrimmage

  * * *

  The Quantum Series

  Book 1: Virtuous

  (Flynn & Natalie)

  Book 2: Valorous

  (Flynn & Natalie)

  Book 3: Victorious

  (Flynn & Natalie)

  Book 4: Rapturous

  (Addie & Hayden)

  Book 5: Ravenous

  (Jasper & Ellie)

  Book 6: Delirious

  (Kristian & Aileen)

  Book 7: Outrageous

  (Emmett & Leah)

  * * *

  Tame Quantum Series

  All the romance, none of the kink…

  Box Set 1, Books 1-3

  Box Set 2, Books 4-6

  * * *

  Romantic Suspense Novels Available from Marie Force

  * * *

  The Fatal Series

  One Night With You, A Fatal Series Prequel Novella

  Book 1: Fatal Affair

  Book 2: Fatal Justice

  Book 3: Fatal Consequences

  Book 3.5: Fatal Destiny The Wedding Novella

  Book 4: Fatal Flaw

  Book 5: Fatal Deception

  Book 6: Fatal Mistake

  Book 7: Fatal Jeopardy

  Book 8: Fatal Scandal

  Book 9: Fatal Frenzy

  Book 10: Fatal Identity

  Book 11: Fatal Threat

  Book 12: Fatal Chaos

  Book 13: Fatal Invasion

  Book 14: Fatal Reckoning

  * * *

  Single Title

  The Wreck

  About the Author

  Marie Force is the New York Times bestselling author of contemporary romance, including the indie-published Gansett Island Series and the Fatal Series from Harlequin Books. In addition, she is the author of the Butler, Vermont Series, the Green Mountain Series and the erotic romance Quantum Series. In 2019, her new historical Gilded series from Kensington Books will debut with Duchess By Deception.

  * * *

  All together, her books have sold 7 million copies worldwide, have been translated into more than a dozen languages and have appeared on the New York Times bestseller list many times. She is also a USA Today and Wall Street Journal bestseller, a Speigel bestseller in Germany, a frequent speaker and publishing workshop presenter as well as a publisher through her Jack’s House Publishing romance imprint. She is a two-time nominee for the Romance Writers of America’s RITA® award for romance fiction.

  * * *

  Her goals in life are simple—to finish raising two happy, healthy, productive young adults, to keep writing books for as long as she possibly can and to never be on a flight that makes the news.

  * * *

  Join Marie's mailing list for news about new books and upcoming appearances in your area. Follow her on Facebook, Twitter @marieforce and on Instagram. Join one of Marie's many reader groups. Contact Marie at [email protected].