How Much I Care (Miami Nights Book 2) Read online

As my phone chimes with a payment for three hundred and twenty dollars from Carmen, I realize I also need to update my sister on everything that’s happened this weekend so she won’t feel left out. I decide to call her when I’m in the car. As I leave Austin’s room, I check the corridor and don’t see anyone out there—thankfully. I don’t want his teammates to catch me leaving his room after having spent the night.

  I make a clean escape and am waiting for my car at the valet stand when my mom calls.

  “Maria! You’re on national TV!”

  “What?”

  “The ceremony at the game! They showed it on the Sunday Today show!”

  “Oh. Wow.” I’m not sure how I’m supposed to feel about our story going national.

  “You look good on TV, sweetheart. And that Austin Jacobs is one handsome man.”

  I couldn’t agree more.

  “His little girl is so cute,” Mom says without taking a breath. “I heard you were at the restaurant with him and his parents last night. How was that?”

  “We had a nice time.”

  “You can tell me all about it at brunch.”

  “I’m skipping brunch today. I’m going to the game.”

  “Oh, all right. Well, I’m sorry I won’t get to see you today.”

  “Dee is calling. I’m going to grab it. Talk to you later.”

  “Love you.”

  “You, too.” I take the call from Dee, who’s screaming.

  “You’re on the Today show!”

  “I heard. Mom just called me.”

  “Holy smoking-hot baseball player, Batman!”

  I smile at my sister’s description of Austin. “You noticed that, huh?”

  “You’d better start talking right now. I talked to Car yesterday, and she deflected, which means there’s stuff to tell.”

  I spend the first part of my ride home filling my sister in on what’s transpired since Austin arrived in Miami.

  “Whoa,” she says when I finish with the note he left me this morning, which is now tucked into my purse. “I love this so hard.”

  “Easy, cowgirl. It’s early days yet.”

  “No, it isn’t. You’ve been crazy about this guy from the first time you ever heard from him.”

  I can’t deny that, so I don’t bother to try. “I’m just trying to maintain a semblance of sanity while Car is telling me to go all in.”

  “I can see both sides of that, for sure. But damn, it’s got to be exciting.”

  “It is.”

  “Speaking of excitement, Marcus’s sister called me yesterday. Apparently, the skank left him.” We have no idea if Marcus’s ex is a skank or not. We only call her that because she’s not Dee. And yes, we know that’s wildly unfair, but the name has stuck.

  “No way! When did that happen?”

  “A week or so ago. Bianca said he hasn’t left his house since. He’s been calling out to work and is a hot mess. She asked me to talk to him.”

  “Come on. No way. How is that your problem?”

  “I think she’s feeling desperate since she’s never seen him go off the deep end this way.”

  “It’s not your problem, Dee. Tell me you know that.”

  “I do,” she says with a sigh. “What does it say about me that I still love him so much that I hurt because he does?”

  “I’m sorry you’re hurting for him. Text him if you must, but don’t get sucked in. It took you so long to get over him. I don’t want you going backward.”

  “I hear you.”

  “I’ve got to run. I’m going to the game today. Austin is starting for the O’s for the last time. He’s a free agent after this season.”

  “That’s exciting. He’s going to cash in.”

  “I suppose so.” Of course, I already know he’s got to be worth millions after six years in the majors, but free agency is next-level money. I can’t think about that. It’s too much on top of a lot. “Talk to you later? And keep me posted on what’s up with Marcus.”

  “I will. Love you.”

  “Love you, too.” The reminder of Dee’s situation with Marcus is a cold dose of reality for me as I get more involved with Austin. Long-distance relationships are almost always a difficult mess, and that’s exactly what I’m setting myself up for with him. Even knowing the potential for disaster, I can’t seem to stop myself where he’s concerned.

  I pull into my driveway and dash up the stairs to my place, where I rush through a shower and blow dry. I can’t wait to watch Austin pitch, and I’m excited to see Everly and his parents again, too.

  If I’ve lost all perspective in this out-of-control situation, well, I’ll have plenty of time to rediscover my perspective after he’s gone.

  Chapter 12

  AUSTIN

  I hated leaving Maria sleeping in my bed, but my agent, Aaron, flew in last night to take this highly unofficial meeting with the Marlins ownership and management. We’re at the palatial home of one of the team’s owners for a friendly breakfast meeting before today’s game.

  There are all kinds of rules about how and when we can talk to the teams who’ve shown an interest in me, and this conversation is so far “off the record” as to have not happened. I’m sitting back and letting Aaron do the talking, which gives me the chance to think about Maria and our night together.

  It’s crazy how much of my awake time lately is devoted to thoughts of her, and how badly I want to spend more time with her. After today, my season is over. The team has one more game in Miami tomorrow, but I’m done, and I have the next few months “off.” Other than daily workouts and pitching practice, I can do whatever I want.

  And what I want is to be with Maria—and my daughter.

  How can I make that happen? Adrenaline speeds through my system as the idea takes shape.

  “AJ,” the team owner says, “we were surprised but happy to hear of your potential interest in playing in Miami, and we’re looking forward to talking to you boys this winter.”

  “Thanks for considering me.”

  “I gotta be honest,” the manager says. “I was surprised to hear we were in the running.”

  “The climate here agrees with me.” We can’t talk details or specifics or anything other than things like the weather, which is spectacular. It’s getting chilly in Baltimore, but not here in Miami, where the sun is bright and warm for most of the year. I could get used to that.

  Aaron still isn’t sure what the hell we’re even doing at this meeting, but that’s okay. He doesn’t need to know why I’m considering Miami. Besides, it’s a long shot at best. A lot of things have to fall into place for me to end up here, and I don’t want to get up my hopes—or Maria’s—until we’re able to talk specifics with the various teams in the running. I’d be an absolute fool to accept a less-than-ideal contract so I can be closer to her.

  Things are a very long way from settled, but for the immediate future, I can do whatever the hell I want. And what I want is her.

  After the meeting, Aaron drives me to the ballpark. “I wish you’d tell me what the fuck this is all about with Miami.”

  “It’s about covering all the bases.”

  “That’s bullshit. Tell me the fucking truth, will you?”

  Because he’s always been straight with me, I decide to give him the same courtesy. “There’s a woman. She lives here.”

  “The bone marrow donor?”

  “Yeah.”

  “Seriously?”

  “Dead seriously.”

  “Didn’t you just meet her this weekend?”

  “In person, but we’ve been talking for weeks.”

  Aaron doesn’t say anything as he processes that information. At nearly forty, my agent is one of the sharpest people I know. He’s been my friend, advocate and sometimes my savior during my MLB career. When Ev was sick, he called in his considerable army of contacts to connect me with some of the best doctors in the world and was tireless in his efforts to help me in any way he could.

  He’s got dark hai
r going gray around the edges and is wearing aviator sunglasses over shrewd dark eyes that don’t miss a trick.

  I have no doubt he’s got something to say, and when we park in the players’ lot at the ballfield, he shuts off the engine of his rental car and turns to me. “I want you to know… Everly’s illness was a fucking nightmare for me, and she’s not even my kid. I can’t imagine what it was like for you. I admire the hell out of the way you handled it, on and off the field.”

  He’s never said any of this to me before. “Thanks, man. You were a rock for me through it all.”

  “I also understand completely why you’d feel an attachment to the woman who saved your child’s life.”

  What I feel for Maria goes so far beyond the word attachment, but I don’t share that with him. He needs to have his say, and I need to listen. I pay him to oversee my career, and he’s only doing his job, which is to keep me from doing something epically stupid.

  “Of course you feel something for her. Anyone would after what she did for you and your daughter. But, AJ, this is your moment. This is what you’ve worked so hard for. You can’t let the deal of a lifetime slip away because of a woman. I like the Marlins. They’re a first-class organization. But you, Austin Jacobs, don’t need to be second to anyone. You’re an ace.”

  “I hear you.”

  “But?”

  “But nothing. I hear what you’re saying, and I don’t disagree.”

  He pulls off his sunglasses and turns his formidable stare on me. That stare has helped him make a shit-ton of money for his clients, including me. “What aren’t you saying?”

  “Nothing. I hear you, I agree with you, and my mind is wide open to all the many possibilities that we’ll encounter this off-season. I simply want to consider Miami as one of the possibilities. That’s all.”

  “That’s not all. What are you up to?”

  “Honestly, Aaron,” I say, laughing. “You’re far too suspicious. I’m not up to anything.”

  “I understand why your head is turned around by her, AJ. She’s a beautiful woman who did the most incredible thing for you and Everly.”

  You don’t know the half of who she is.

  “Tell me you aren’t going to base the most important decision of your life on a woman you barely know.”

  I stare out the window at the players’ entrance to the ballpark.

  “AJ.”

  Glancing at him, I smile. “I’m keeping all my options wide open. Including Miami.” I reach over to shake his hand. “Thanks for coming down for the meeting.”

  He shakes my hand, but I can tell he’s got more he wants to say. A lot more. But I get out of the car and head inside to prepare for my start. That’s what I need to be focused on today. I’ll have time after the game to figure out what’s next.

  MARIA

  Austin’s parents greet me warmly when I join them in yet another VIP section near the third-base line. We have a perfect view of the mound, which is the only thing any of us want to see today. Everly lets out a happy squeal when she sees me, and Austin’s dad hands her over to me.

  I’m moved by the greeting as I take her into my arms and kiss her chubby cheek. “Hi, pumpkin. How’re you today?”

  “Dada play.”

  “That’s right. Dada’s pitching today. Are you excited to watch him?”

  Everly nods, making her blond curls bob adorably. She’s wearing a Baltimore Orioles sun hat and a tiny jersey with Jacobs on the back. She settles on my lap and stays there through the top of the first while the Orioles are at bat.

  She lets out a squeal when Austin takes the field for the bottom of the first. “Dada!”

  “There he is,” Deidre says, standing to clap for her son.

  He finds us in the stands and blows a kiss to Everly.

  She blows one back, and I’m slayed by their cuteness.

  Everly wants to sit on her grandpa’s shoulders to watch Austin pitch, so I pass her back to him and give Austin my full attention. I love watching his intense concentration, the silent communication with his teammates and the way he uses his entire body to power his fastball. Even though I’m a huge Marlins fan, I find his domination over the Marlins hitters sexy as hell.

  In the seventh inning, the O’s are up five to two, when the manager comes to the mound to pull Austin from the game.

  As he leaves the field, probably for the last time in a Baltimore uniform, the Orioles fans in the crowd give him a warm ovation that he acknowledges with a tip of his cap and a smile that seems directed right at me.

  On the way into the dugout, he blows a kiss to Everly.

  “Dada!”

  “He’s working for a little while longer,” Deidre tells her granddaughter. “And then we can see him.”

  That seems to pacify Everly, who decides she wants to sit with me again. First, her grandmother insists on applying more sunscreen, and then she can come sit with me. As I hold Everly in my arms, it occurs to me all over again that this child is alive today because of me and the miracles of modern medicine.

  To look at her now, you’d never know that she was so terribly ill just over a year ago. As I hold her sturdy little body in my arms, I pray that she’ll continue to grow and thrive and that her remission will hold indefinitely. The thought of the disease coming back is terrifying to me, and I only just met her. How in the world do Austin and his family cope with that possibility?

  “Tomorrow’s supposed to be a total rainout,” Jeff says after scrolling through his phone. “The game’s canceled, and this’ll be the season ender for both teams.” A groan goes through the crowd as the news hits about tomorrow’s game being canceled.

  I immediately wonder if that means Austin will leave tonight rather than Tuesday morning. And why does the thought of him going sooner make me feel me so flattened? Because you knew he was here for only the weekend, and you let yourself get caught up in the craziness. And now you’re going to pay for that when he leaves and you’re right back where you started—alone and falling for a man who doesn’t live here and probably never will.

  I watch the last two innings of the game, making conversation with Deidre and Jeff and helping to keep Everly entertained, while trying to hide my turmoil from them. All Everly wants is to see Dada, and we must explain to her a hundred times that Dada is still working. She can’t see him on the field, so she doesn’t like that explanation.

  By the time the game ends with a win for Austin and the O’s, we’re all ready to get out of there.

  “We’re going to get this cranky girl back to the hotel to finish packing before our flight,” Deidre says. “It’s been so lovely to meet you and spend this time with you, Maria. I hope we’ll see you again sometime.”

  I hug her. “I hope so, too.”

  Jeff is holding Everly, so I give her a kiss on the cheek. “Be a good girl for Gamma and Pop,” I tell her.

  She reaches for me, so I take her from Jeff and give her a hug. “Take care, sweet girl.”

  I hand her back to her grandfather, wondering if I’ll ever see any of them again. We walk out of the stadium together and go our separate ways. Everly waves to me until I’m out of sight. I navigate post-game traffic on the way home, my emotions all over the place. I haven’t done any of my Sunday stuff, so I take a detour and hit the grocery store to get what I need for lunches this week. When I return home, I change into a T-shirt and leggings and curl up on the sofa to watch the SportsCenter breakdown of Austin’s last outing in an O’s uniform, all the while wondering why I feel so heartbroken.

  Nothing has really changed, I tell myself, even as I know that everything changed when he came to my home on Friday night and turned my world upside down even more than he already had prior to that.

  I can’t help but wonder what happens now.

  AUSTIN

  After the game, we’re told that tomorrow’s game is canceled. My high from notching a final win for the season quickly becomes a low when I realize the team will be flying back to Baltimore ton
ight rather than Tuesday morning.

  Just that quickly, I make a decision. “Guys, could I have a minute?”

  The usual uproar in the locker room that follows a win takes a second to die down. One of the other guys whistles sharply to get the attention of those who didn’t hear me.

  “Shut up,” Santiago says to two of the younger guys. “AJ wants to say something.”

  I smile at my friend, who rolls his eyes. “Listen, I just wanted to say thank you for six great years in Baltimore. I have no idea what this off-season holds for me, but we all know I probably won’t be back with you next year. Even though this is the end of the road for us as a team, I hope you’ll all keep in touch. I’ll be rooting for you guys from wherever I end up.”

  I see Mick, the rest of the coaching staff, the trainers, front office people and one of the owners have stepped into the room. I nod at them as I look around at the others, allowing my gaze to land on each of my teammates. “For the rest of my life, I’ll never forget the way all of you, your significant others and this organization stepped up for me and my family when my daughter was sick.” My voice wavers on the word daughter. I need to quit while I’m ahead. “Thank you seems so insignificant, but it’s all I’ve got. That’s it. That’s what I wanted to say.”

  After a rousing round of applause, each of the guys hugs me, slaps me on the back, wishes me good luck with free agency and promises to keep in touch. I hug the coaches, trainers, Erica and others from the front office. Mick is the last one left, and he gives me a gruff one-armed pat on the back.

  “Thanks for everything, Coach.”

  “Been a pleasure, AJ.”

  “I’m gonna hang here for a couple of days, so I won’t be on the flight.”

  “Thanks for letting me know. Talk to Erica if you need the hotel room extended.”

  “I will. Thanks again, Coach.”

  “Take care of yourself and your little girl, AJ. We’re all pulling for her.”

  “Means the world to me. I’ll definitely be in touch.”

  The guys file out of the locker room, headed to catch the bus to the hotel, where they’ll grab their stuff before continuing to the airport to go home early. By the end of the season, we’re all ready to get home to our families and be off the travel grind. Under normal circumstances, I’d be the first one on the bus, ready to get home.