THE FALL Read online

  "You're right, their opinions do factor in even if I wish they didn't. I'm going to give it some thought over the next few months and see what develops. I don't want to give one patient too much credit or blame, but losing Joey was a blow. It was like something in me kind of shut down after that. And in my line of work, being emotionally removed isn't a luxury I can afford."

  "You've had a bad month, and it's probably best not to do anything rash right now."

  "I know. I need to ride it out for a while until things are more normal and I can think clearly."

  "That's a good idea. You love that job, Duff. It's getting you down right now, but I think you'd regret it if you walked away without giving it careful consideration."

  "I know I would."

  "Well, I'm here if you need to vent."

  "And I'm going to be dying to know what happens when Gina gets those flowers."

  "Me, too," Parker said with a sigh. "Me, too."

  * * *

  Smitty pulled up to Caroline's building right at ten o'clock. Traffic in Connecticut and on the New England Thruway had added an hour to an already interminable ride. Chip and Elise got out of the backseat and helped Smitty and Caroline retrieve their bags.

  Chip shook hands with Smitty. "See you Friday, if not before."

  "Sounds good."

  Caroline hugged Elise. "Congratulations again. I want to hear all about the wedding plans."

  "Oh, you will. Don't worry."

  Chip and Elise got back in the car and pulled into traffic, leaving Smitty and Caroline standing on the sidewalk.

  She looked up at him. "I want to ask you to come in because we need to talk, but after what happened earlier I don't know if I want you in my house."

  "I'm sorry about that. I was totally out of line, and I apologize."

  She eyed him warily. "All right, then. Come on in."

  Smitty carried their bags and her crutches up the stairs to the brownstone where she rented the first floor.

  She unlocked the door and flipped on the lights.

  He dropped his two bags next to the door. "Where do you want these?" he asked, holding her bags.

  "Right there is fine, thanks. I'll take care of them later. Do you want something to drink?"

  "No, I'm good."

  After a moment of awkward silence she turned to him. "Smitty—"

  "Caroline—"

  "Go ahead." She twisted her hands. "You go first."

  "I really am sorry about what happened before. There's no excuse for that kind of behavior. No excuse at all. I hope you'll forgive me." He looked down, and his foot nudged at the edge of the faded oriental carpet that covered the wood floor.

  "I do forgive you."

  He slanted his eyes back up to meet hers. "I think we both know this isn't working."

  She stared at him in amazement. He was breaking up with her? For real? After the way he'd acted earlier at the pool?

  "I've had a really great time with you, but I think it's run its course, don't you?"

  Astounded, Caroline stared at him. "If that's how you feel," she sputtered, "what was with that whole alpha male act at the pool today?"

  He shrugged. "I was just enjoying the time we had left on Block Island. I can't believe you're surprised. I haven't exactly been feeling the love from you the last week or two."

  "See, that's the thing. I'd kind of been feeling it from you. The love that is."

  He snorted. "Sweetheart, you're a great girl, and we've had some fun times, but that's all it was. Fun. I'm sorry if you read more into it than that."

  Thrown, Caroline said, "No need to be sorry. It was fun, and I enjoyed being with you. Very much. I hope we can still be friends."

  "Sure we can. I'm going to be out of the country for a month, maybe two. When I get back we can go for a drink or something."

  "Where are you going?" she asked, confused. What's going on here?

  "My partners asked me to go to Sydney to check out a company we want to acquire that's headquartered there. I didn't want to say anything about it until after the Duffys' party."

  "You haven't told the guys?"

  He shook his head. "You're the first to know. I'd been putting off going because it's summer and we've got the house in Newport. But they told me Thursday they want me there within the week. I didn't want to get everyone wound up about it this weekend."

  Caroline was reeling. "Will you let me know you got there safely?"

  "I can do that. So what did you want to say?

  "Nothing." She took a step toward him. "It doesn't matter now."

  He leaned in to kiss her cheek. "Take care."

  "You, too."

  He picked up his bags at the door and turned back to look at her one last time but didn't say anything more.

  After the door had closed quietly behind him, Caroline dropped into the closest chair. What the hell just happened here?

  Chapter 19

  Smitty left Caroline's and went to the corner to hail a cab. The Upper East Side traffic was heavy for a Sunday night in July, and when he had waited fifteen minutes without getting a cab, he decided to walk the ten blocks home.

  Tossing his duffel and garment bags over his shoulder, he trudged slowly north through the humid night. He had gone about three blocks when the numbness wore off and the pain caught up to him. He lowered himself to a stoop in front of another brownstone and dropped his head into his hands. After the longest twenty-four hours of his life, he was finally alone and no longer had to hide how devastated he was by the betrayal of two people he cared the most about. He was finally free to let it out.

  The street was deserted otherwise the sight of the strapping man crying surely would have attracted the attention of passersby.

  She knew I loved her. Smitty wiped his face with the back of his hand. She knew, which means he probably knows, too. Are they having a laugh at my expense right at this moment? No, Ted wouldn't do that.

  Smitty laughed through his tears. Yeah, well, you didn't think he'd steal your girlfriend, either.

  He sat in the dark thinking about the time he had spent with Caroline, the years he'd considered Ted Duffy his best friend, and the awesome task he had ahead of him as he learned to live without them. What he had told her about the trip to Sydney was only partially true. His company hoped to buy a small investment firm there. That part was true as was what he had said about being asked to send someone to check it out. He'd even had the ideal employee in mind for the due diligence study that needed to be done before the purchase could go forward. He'd had no intention of going himself until he overheard Ted and Caroline the other night and realized that being halfway around the world for the next month or two would have its benefits.

  No way was he going to stick around to watch the two of them together. No freaking way. Since he planned to maintain his friendship with Parker and Chip, he would have to see Ted occasionally. That would be hard to avoid. But he needed some time to get used to the idea of Ted and Caroline as a couple before he had to see it.

  I wonder what he plans to tell Chip and Parker about her. It's not like he can just show up with her in Newport next weekend and act like it's no big deal, right? So what's your plan, Ted? Going to have to keep this under wraps for a while, aren't you? You'll be concerned about alienating Chip and Parker, too, so you won't tell them—at least until a respectable amount of time has passed. Let me ask you this, my friend, how much time is enough when you've stolen your best friend's girl? I'm sure I'll hear all about it when he decides to go public with her, but I sure as hell ain't going to be around to see it.

  Smitty got up, grabbed his bags, and covered the last seven blocks quickly. All at once he just wanted to be home.

  * * *

  Ted was pacing in the living room of his condo when Caroline finally called at eleven fifteen. His heart in his throat, he pounced on the cell phone. "Hey."

  "Hi. Sorry it's so late."

  "I was starting to seriously freak out. Are you all right?"
/>
  "I think so."

  "Was it bad?"

  "No, it was … um … odd."

  "Odd how?"

  "He broke up with me."

  Ted was speechless.

  "He said, 'I think we both know this has run its course. It's been fun, you're a great girl, but it's not going anywhere.'" When Ted didn't reply, she said, "Are you still there?"

  "I'm here. I'm just stunned. I mean he was making me crazy acting so possessive at the pool today."

  "I asked him why he had done that if he was planning to break up with me, and he said he was enjoying the time we had left on Block Island. He said he was sorry if I had read more into it than that."

  "Everyone was so sure he was in love with you."

  "He laughed when I said that."

  "I can't figure this out."

  "Me either. Get this, too. He's going to Sydney for at least a month for work."

  Processing it all, Ted ran a hand through his hair. "When did that happen?"

  "Apparently his partners told him Thursday they want him to go check out a company they want to buy. He didn't want to say anything about it until after the weekend."

  "None of this makes any sense."

  "I've been sitting here for thirty minutes trying to make sense of it myself."

  "You don't think…"

  "What?"

  "No…"

  "What were you going to say?"

  "Do you think somehow he knows about us?"

  "No way," she said. "He would've flipped out, don't you think?"

  "I would think so. What if Parker told him what he came home to Friday night and somehow Smitty put two and two together?"

  "Did Parker talk to you about that?"

  "He asked me if I'd heard anything, and I said no. I hated lying to him, but it wasn't like I could admit that you'd been upstairs talking to me while I was in bed. He said he didn't tell Smitty about it, and I got the impression he didn't plan to."

  Her sigh was deep and pained. "This is a terrible way for us to start a relationship, Ted. All these lies and people getting hurt because of us."

  "I know. I think I'm getting an ulcer from the stress of it." He realized she was crying. "Oh, Caroline, don't."

  "I can't help it. This has been a very long day."

  "What happened after you guys left the pool?" The desire to know had burned in him for hours.

  "Nothing," she whispered.

  "When I heard you crying in there I almost took down the door."

  She was crying so hard now she couldn't speak.

  Ted's jaw clenched with tension. "Caroline, honey, tell me."

  "I can't."

  "You're frightening me. Please. Tell me." He heard her sniffling as she tried to control her tears.

  "He wanted to … you know … have sex."

  Ted exhaled a long deep breath and waited for her to continue.

  "I told him to stop a couple of times, but he wouldn't. He was really rough with me, and for a minute…"

  "What, honey?" Ted whispered.

  "I thought he was going to rape me."

  "No," Ted gasped. "No. He wouldn't. He couldn't."

  "He was going to. I know he was. But I yelled at him to stop, and all of sudden he finally heard me. It was almost like he went a little crazy or something."

  "I'm coming there. Right now."

  "No, Ted! You can't! It's too late, and you have to work tomorrow. I'm all right. He apologized."

  "I don't care if he apologized! I can't believe he would do something like that. That's not the Smitty I know." Once again Ted's gut clenched at the thought that Smitty might've felt he had good reason to want to punish Caroline. "I'm leaving right now." He picked up the bag he hadn't yet unpacked from the weekend. Whatever else he needed he would buy in New York. "Just give me your address, and I'll be there in a few hours."

  "You don't need to come," she insisted in a voice still hoarse with tears and emotion. "What about work?"

  "I'm going to do something I haven't done in six years—call in sick. I need to be with you right now, Caroline. I can't wait two weeks. Not after all this."

  "You're going to fall asleep at the wheel. I can't let you do this."

  Cradling his cell phone in the crook of his neck, he tossed his bag into the trunk of the car. "After what you just told me, do you honestly think I could sleep without seeing for myself that you're all right?"

  "Ted…"

  "I'm on my way. I can't believe everything that has happened, but it seems that I find myself head over heels in love with you, and I'm going to be there as soon as I can. Now, are you going to tell me where you live?"

  She laughed through her tears and gave him her address. "This is crazy. You're crazy."

  "Crazy about you," he said softly as he pushed the Mercedes up to eighty-five on his way to I-93 South.

  "I never imagined I could feel so good and so bad at the same time."

  "It's going to get better. We just have to get through this rough patch, and then everything's going to be fine."

  "Promise?"

  "I promise. I can't believe I can talk to you whenever I want to now. You're going to get fed up with me calling you all the time."

  "I don't think I'll ever run out of things I want to tell you."

  "I hope you never do. In light of this new-found freedom of ours, do you know what I've been dying to ask you for two weeks?"

  "What?"

  "Right before you fell when we were running you were going to tell me something you said was a secret. We never got around to finishing that conversation."

  She chuckled. "No, we didn't, did we?"

  "What was the big secret?"

  "I'm going to write a book," she confessed. "I've actually already started it."

  "Really? That's awesome! What's it about?"

  "A dashing young doctor falls in love with his best friend's girlfriend," she teased.

  He laughed. "I'm sure it'll be a best seller."

  "I don't know about that," she said softly. "But it's going to be one hell of a romance."

  "Oh, yes." The rush of emotion took his breath away. "Yes, it is."

  Chapter 20

  Ted lost twenty minutes when he was stopped for speeding outside Greenwich, Connecticut. He tossed the four-hundred-dollar ticket onto the passenger seat and hit the gas the minute the state trooper was out of sight.

  He had convinced Caroline to try to get some sleep and told her he would call her when he got close. At one thirty he stopped for coffee and called the hospital. He told them he had strep throat and asked them to call in another attending physician to cover for him for the next two days. As he got closer to New York City, his heart began to pound with excitement and nerves and anticipation. Twelve hours hadn't passed since he had last seen her, but it had been too long.

  The city that never sleeps was indeed wide-awake at a quarter to three that Monday morning. Ted wove between trucks and cabs as he made his way to the Upper East Side. When he reached the east Fifties, he called her, and the sound of her sleepy voice was enough to arouse him. "I'm five minutes away."

  "I'll be waiting for you."

  He flipped the phone closed and willed his pounding heart and jittery stomach to chill out. Even though he was accustomed to going without sleep, he wasn't used to middle-of-the-night road trips and was wired from the caffeine he had relied upon to stay awake.

  In a stroke of good luck that he took as a sign of things to come, someone was pulling out of a parking space in front of Caroline's house, so he grabbed the spot and dashed across the street. She waited for him at the top of the stairs wearing a pale green silk robe over the same type of short nightgown that had dominated his fantasies since he first saw her in it on Friday night.

  He took the stairs two at a time and had her in his arms so quickly neither of them had time to brace themselves for the onslaught of emotion. Her tears were warm against his neck as he held her tightly to him.

  Several long minute
s later he pulled back to brush the tears off her cheeks with his lips before he tipped her face up to receive his kiss. "Finally," he whispered against her lips.

  Ted felt the punch of the hot, deep kiss everywhere. He lifted her to him, and she managed, even with her cast, to wrap her legs around his waist. Without breaking the kiss he moved through the open door and into her apartment. Kicking the door closed behind him, he lowered her onto the sofa and came down on top of her. Urgent need thrummed through him, but he forced himself to slow down and to remember what had brought him here in the middle of the night.

  He kissed her eyelids, the end of her nose, both cheeks, and then her lips again, but this time he was gentle.

  She moaned and tightened her arms around him.

  "Did he hurt you?" Ted whispered. "Are you hurt anywhere?"

  "No, it wasn't like that. I don't want you to think about it anymore."

  "If he was anyone else I'd want to kill him for hurting you."

  "He didn't hurt me so much as scare me."

  Ted trembled at the feel of her fingers on his back. "I love you," he whispered against her neck. "I love you so much. No one's ever going to scare you like that again. Ever." He found her lips and fell into another soulful kiss.

  "I love you, too," she said. "I can't believe it, but I do."

  "Believe it." He realized just then that he wanted to kiss her like this every day for the rest of his life. He'd never experienced anything quite as intoxicating as kissing Caroline.

  "Did you call work?" she asked when they finally resurfaced.

  "Mmm," he said against her lips. "I took two days because I'm so sick."

  "Two days," she said with a contented sigh. "What do I need to be afraid of catching?"

  "Strep throat." He dipped his tongue to tangle with hers. "It's highly contagious."

  She met his teasing tongue with playful nips of her teeth. "I don't think I've been adequately exposed."

  He chuckled. "I can fix that."

  She writhed beneath him, her hips arching against his erection, causing his breath to catch in his throat.

  "Caroline, honey, wait."

  "What's wrong?"

  "I want you so much that sometimes I think I'll go mad from wanting you. But everything's moved so fast. Will you think I'm crazy if I just want to hold you for a while until I catch my breath? Now that we have all the time in the world I'd like to take my time. Does that make sense?"