Yours After Dark: Gansett Island Series, Book 20 Page 6

  “Stop.” He spoke to his reflection in the mirror as he shaved. “You already made your decision, and you aren’t going to change your plans for a woman you only just met.” Except… “No. Tonight is just another night with the family and nothing more. Stick to the script.” Maybe if he kept telling himself it was just another night, he might start to believe his own bullshit.

  His reaction to her defied explanation or reason. All he knew was that the minute he walked into the salon and saw her, the air around him had felt different, charged with something bigger than anything he’d felt before. He felt stupid explaining it to himself that way, so he couldn’t imagine trying to explain it to anyone else.

  Over the weekend that he’d spent partially with Riley and Nik and partially alone, he’d decided the reaction to her had been an anomaly. A one-off. The result of meeting a sexy woman he found attractive. By the time Monday had rolled around, he’d written off the entire experience as irrelevant. She’d said she wasn’t interested. His father had taught him from an early age how to accept no as an answer from a woman.

  And then she’d shown up at the Wayfarer earlier, and it was game back on. The same feeling of electricity in the air had accompanied her into his space, leaving him feeling amped the way he did when he drank too much coffee.

  I wish you weren’t leaving.

  God, how many times had he relived that moment in the hours since she left? Hundreds? It wasn’t only the words, which had been powerful in their own right. He was haunted by how she’d looked at him as she said them, as if she saw something special in him and was sorry to miss out on whatever they could’ve been.

  With his hands on either side of the pedestal sink, he dropped his head, hoping to alleviate the tension that’d gathered in his neck. He’d turned this date into a big deal when he knew it couldn’t be.

  His phone buzzed with a text that snapped him out of his thoughts.

  Hey baby! Counting down the days until you get home. Can’t wait to see you. Love you!

  The text from Missy reminded him of the unfinished business he had with her. He replied to her text with a smile emoji, his stomach aching from the odd sense of dismay that had come over him when he read her text. He didn’t want to hear from her. He wanted to hear from Chloe, which was bonkers considering he’d known Missy for years and Chloe for days.

  As he got dressed in a clean button-down and jeans, he thought about what his dad and Riley would have to say about him “going home to Missy.” Even if that wasn’t exactly what he was doing. He was going home to work and figure out his life. If Missy was part of that life, that would be his call to make and no one else’s. He refused to allow his dad or brother to get so far inside his head that they made major life decisions for him.

  Missy had made it clear she wanted to be on-again, texting and calling frequently to tell him she missed him, she loved him and wanted to start over, this time as adults and not the stupid kids they’d been way back when. They’d both changed and matured and held on to their friendship for all the time they’d been apart. That had to count for something.

  He wanted to be fair to her, to judge her on the person she was today, not who she’d been in the past when their relationship had bordered on toxic at times. That was what his dad and brother remembered. They hadn’t been privy to the good times—and there’d been a lot of them. Enough to keep him in touch with her for the two years he’d been gone.

  But tonight wasn’t about her, he thought as he got into his truck. Tonight was for Chloe and his family. There’d be plenty of time later to figure out what he was going to do about Missy and the unfinished business he had with her.

  Chapter 6

  When he pulled into Chloe’s driveway, his skin began to tingle with anticipation. He had no idea what that meant as it had never happened before simply from knowing he was going to see someone. He’d known a lot of women, had done his share of dating, had slept with an even dozen of them, but had never once experienced anything like what happened to him when he merely thought about Chloe.

  And then she appeared in the doorway, acknowledging his arrival with a wave before she bent to kiss Ranger goodbye.

  The tingling became a waterfall of sensation traveling the full length of him, as if his body had been plugged into an outlet. He’d intended to get out of the truck, to greet her properly, but he found he couldn’t move as he watched her come toward him. How could he possibly describe the feeling of being almost outside himself, watching the scene play out from a neutral vantage point?

  She opened the passenger door and got in, bringing the distinctive scent that belonged only to her, and smiled at him.

  He felt like he’d been punched.

  “Finn? Are you all right?”

  “I… I don’t know.”

  Her brows furrowed with concern. “What’s wrong?”

  “Nothing.” He studied her beautiful face, the violet eyes that held him in her thrall and the lips he desperately wanted to kiss.

  “You’re sure?”

  “Why did you say you’re sorry I’m leaving?”

  “Because I am.”

  “Why?”

  “I’m not sure exactly.”

  “I feel something when I see you.” He released a huff of laughter. He’d had absolutely no intention of beginning their evening with true confessions, but there was no stopping him now. “Hell, I feel it when I think about you, and I don’t understand it. It’s never happened to me before.”

  “I feel it, too.” She spoke so softly, he almost didn’t hear her.

  As he turned in his seat to face her, his heart beat fast with desire that left him breathless and lightheaded. “Chloe, I need you to explain this to me.”

  “I wish I could.”

  Drawn to her in ways he’d never been to anyone else, he caressed her cheek with a light touch.

  She trembled, and her lips parted.

  “Why can I not stop thinking about you?”

  Her nervous laughter went a long way toward calming the nerves that had seized him at the first sight of her coming out the door to him. To know she felt similarly undone helped. “Probably for the same reasons I can’t stop thinking about you.”

  “It doesn’t make any sense.”

  She looked down at her hands. “It really doesn’t.” And then she turned those expressive eyes up to meet his gaze, and again, he felt like he’d been struck by something powerful. “I don’t do this stuff.”

  “What stuff?” He continued to caress her face because he couldn’t bear to stop touching her.

  “This.” She gestured between them.

  “Why?”

  “Many reasons.”

  “Tell me.” He let the silk of her dark hair with the colorful accents run through his fingers, noting the way she leaned toward him while telling him she didn’t do these things.

  “I don’t take risks.”

  “Why not?”

  “I… Um, well, because. What does it matter? You’re leaving. This isn’t happening.”

  “It’s happening right now. You said you feel it the same way I do. Tell me why you don’t take risks.”

  “They don’t usually end well for me.” She reached for the hand that had been caressing her hair and placed it on the seat between them.

  Finn immediately mourned the loss and then wondered what in the ever-loving fuck he was doing having such a thought. How could you lose something you’d never had in the first place?

  “Maybe we should skip tonight,” she said, her expression grim.

  “Is that what you want?”

  “No, but…”

  Finn had no idea why, but he knew he’d regret not spending tonight with her. “Let’s go to Janey’s and have some fun. There’s no risk in that, right?”

  The look she gave him told him otherwise.

  “Is that okay?”

  “I’d love to go, but after that…”

  “I get it.” Disappointment overwhelmed him as he backed the t
ruck out of her driveway and headed for his cousin’s home. They rode in silence for the ten minutes it took to get to Janey’s, but the feelings she aroused in him continued to cascade through him, his awareness of her ever-present, distracting, unprecedented.

  Still reeling, he escorted Chloe into Janey’s house, made sure she had a drink and friends to talk to before he stepped outside, looking for Riley. As usual these days, Riley had an arm around Nikki as they talked to Shane and Janey’s husband, Joe.

  Riley released Nikki to give Finn a side handshake. “Hey, bro.”

  Finn forced himself to greet the others, to go through the motions with his family, to eat the delicious steak dinner Janey and Joe had prepared, to make small talk, to try to act normal when he felt anything but. The first chance he got after dinner, he asked Riley if he could talk to him by tipping his head toward the yard beyond the patio where everyone was gathered. His brother said something to Nikki, kissed her forehead and joined Finn.

  “What’s up?”

  “I don’t know.” How to explain the unexplainable? Finn ran his hand over his mouth, more nervous than he recalled ever being. “There’s something weird going on with Chloe.”

  “What happened?”

  He looked at his brother, the person who knew him better than anyone and who loved to bust his balls—and vice versa. Was he making a mistake confiding in Riley? Probably, but he needed someone to explain this to him. “The minute I saw her…” Shaking his head, he couldn’t articulate the thoughts circling through his mind.

  “What?”

  Finn tried to find the words he needed while praying his brother wouldn’t make light of something that was so important to him, perhaps the most important thing that’d ever happened to him. “It was like someone had electrified the air. That sounds so stupid, but that’s what happened.”

  Riley eyes widened. “What else?”

  “I had this, like, tingling thing here.” Finn raised a hand to the back of his neck. “And elsewhere.”

  “Oh. My. God.”

  “What?” Finn asked, alarmed.

  “You’ve met her.”

  “Who?”

  “The one. Your Nikki.”

  Finn shook his head. “It’s not like that.”

  “Isn’t it? What you described? It’s exactly what happened to me the first time I saw Nik. I still feel electrified every time I lay eyes on her, and when I touch her…” Riley looked dazed. “There’re no words to describe what that’s like.”

  Finn was thankful that Riley didn’t have those words, because he certainly didn’t want to hear the dirty details. He was too busy reeling from what Riley had said about Chloe being his “one.”

  “You need to pursue this, Finn.”

  “She doesn’t want that.”

  “How do you know?”

  “She said so. She said she doesn’t take risks.” Once again, he experienced a sinking feeling inside, as if he’d lost something precious, something he’d never had in the first place.

  “Ask her why.”

  “I don’t know…”

  “Finn, listen to me. Do you remember how I was after I met Nikki and then she left?”

  “Ah, yeah. We all remember the months before she came back.”

  “I’ve never been more unhappy or miserable than I was after realizing I’d let something special slip through my fingers. It was the worst feeling I’ve ever had. I wouldn’t wish that on anyone, let alone you. If you don’t at least try with her, you’ll regret it. That much I know for sure.”

  Nikki walked over to join them, eyeing them with curiosity. “Everything okay, boys?”

  Riley put his arm around her and drew her into his embrace, kissing the top of her head. “Yeah, babe.”

  Not for the first time, Finn noted how Nikki melted into Riley and the way they fit together, like two halves of a whole. He wanted that. He wanted what they had, what his dad had found with Chelsea. And he hadn’t even realized that was what he wanted until Chloe electrified his world. He glanced toward the deck where she was talking to Katie and Laura, laughing and using her hands to make a point.

  She was so fucking gorgeous.

  “Oh damn,” Nikki said. “What’s going on with our Finnbar?”

  “He’s met a woman who makes him tingle.”

  Finn gave Riley the fiercest look he owned. “Shut up, Riley.”

  Nikki gasped and then hugged him. “Oh, Finn! Really? This is so exciting! Is it Chloe? She’s been looking at you the whole time you were over here talking to Riley. That’s why I came over. After she came by today, I wanted to know what was up with you guys.”

  “Nothing is up.” But hearing Chloe had been watching him filled him with hope.

  When Finn would’ve walked away, Riley stopped him with a hand to his shoulder. “Finn… Wait. I swear to God, I’m not going to be a dick about this. It’s too important.”

  “No, it’s not. She’s not into it. Just forget I said anything.”

  “Finn—”

  “Seriously, Ri. Leave it alone.” Finn was on his way to a clean escape, but Mac came over to talk to them, holding three beers in one hand.

  He gave each of them a beer. “Just the cousins I needed to see. We landed a big job this afternoon. You know the Curtis place out on Westview Road?”

  “Can’t say that I do,” Riley said.

  “It’s that huge old Victorian with the awesome gables? Looks like a haunted mansion?”

  “I know that place,” Nikki said. “One of my summer friends lived there back in the day. The place was creepier than hell.”

  Mac nodded. “That’s the one. We were all scared shitless of that house when we were kids. Anyway, the Curtis family has hired us to renovate and modernize it over the next few months, and I’m counting on you guys to help us get it done. They’re hoping to host a family wedding there in October and wanted my assurances that we could get it finished in time.”

  “I’m in,” Riley said. “Sounds awesome. I can’t wait to check it out.”

  “Excellent.” Mac touched his beer bottle to Riley’s. “You, too, Finn?”

  “Ah, I don’t think so. I’m still planning to head home after Shane’s wedding and the Wayfarer opening.” As he said the words, his gaze connected with Chloe’s, and he felt the impact like a punch to the gut that left him stunned.

  “You sure about that?” Riley asked, raising a brow.

  “Yeah, I am.” She wasn’t interested. She didn’t take risks. Finn couldn’t upend his plans for a woman he’d seen four times who didn’t want what he did. He wasn’t getting any younger, and it was time to find someone who had the same goals he did—marriage, children, dogs, a house in the suburbs and perhaps a business they could run together. That’d be fun.

  Mac groaned. “Come on, Finn. You’re killing me here. I need you.”

  “Thank you so much for everything you’ve done for me and the things you’ve taught me. I appreciate the opportunity to work with and for you more than you’ll ever know. But I’m going home.”

  “We’ll miss you,” Mac said, sighing with resignation. “It won’t be the same without you.”

  “I’m sorry to let you down.”

  “Oh, stop. You’re not. We’ll figure something out. I just hope you find what you’re looking for on the mainland. Funny how I had to come back here to find everything I ever wanted.” He glanced at Maddie. “Sometimes what you’re looking for is right under your nose. And on that note, I need to check on my wife.”

  After Mac left them, Riley said, “He’s right, you know. What if she’s the one for you and you walk away without ever knowing what could’ve been?”

  Riley’s question only made Finn feel worse.

  I wish you weren’t leaving. As her words came to mind, her gaze collided with his, and she smiled at him. In that moment, he questioned everything, especially his plan to leave.

  Chapter 7

  Mac wandered over to check on Maddie, who had her swollen feet up on
one of the coolers. Her obvious fatigue worried him, but then, everything worried him when she was pregnant. After they’d lost their third child, Connor, in utero, they lived in a perpetual state of dread the entire time she was pregnant. Whenever he thought about being stranded on a remote island and how she might need something he couldn’t get her, he could feel his blood pressure spike from the anxiety. He squatted next to her. “How you doing, hon?”

  “Just ducky.”

  He smiled and brought her hand to his lips. “Can I get you anything?”

  “I’m good, but thanks. Laura asked if I’m having triplets.”

  “What did you tell her?”

  “I deflected, but we’re going to have to share the news before long. I’m getting really big.”

  “I’m still in complete denial that there’re two of them in there.”

  Maddie’s smile lit up her gorgeous face. “Two girls.”

  He put his hands over his ears. “I can’t hear you. Lalalalalalalalala.”

  She tugged at his arm to uncover one ear. “We have to tell people.”

  “Don’t wanna.”

  “Keeping it secret isn’t going to change the story.”

  “Can’t hear you.”

  “Mac…”

  “Maddie…”

  “We have to tell our families that we’re having twins.”

  “Are you sure we have to tell them?”

  “I’m positive.”

  “And we have to do this now?”

  “Well, everyone is here…”

  He whimpered.

  She patted his head. “It’s going to be all right.”

  “How is it going to be all right? There’re going to be five of them and two of us. They’re going to overthrow the management and take over the house.”

  “Mac.”

  In her golden-brown eyes, he usually found his center, but lately he’d had trouble finding anything but turbulence no matter where he looked.